Phuket cabaret show: worth it?

The short verdict

Go if an hour of feathers, sequins and quick-fire costume changes sounds like fun, and if you are relaxed about the music coming from recordings. The revue is polished, short and simple to fit around dinner, which makes it an easy first or last night on the island. Give it a miss if you want live vocals, a story to follow or a meal with the show, because none of those are on offer here. Book ahead when one particular date matters to you; if your evenings are open, buying at the door is a fallback that works too.

What kind of show you are buying

Picture a revue in the old theatrical sense: a run of separate numbers with no plot, each with its own costume, painted backdrop and mood. In this one the numbers swing from Thai classical pieces to Western pop. The performers are kathoey, the Thai term for people assigned male at birth whose gender expression is female or feminine, and they work as a professional company of dancers. Every number is mimed to a recorded track, which is how cabaret and drag revues commonly work, so what you are watching is movement, timing, styling and slick stage management rather than vocal range.

Why nobody sings live

Lip syncing means matching mouth movements to a recorded voice. When the audience knows it is happening, it works as a kind of musical pantomime, and it has long been a fixture of drag performance. Singers also mime for a practical reason: it keeps heavily choreographed dance numbers sharp, because nobody runs out of breath halfway through a routine. The result is a show where each song sounds exactly as it did in rehearsal and the cast can throw everything into the dancing. If a live voice is the thing you want to pay for, a concert will serve you better than this hour.

Who is on stage

The cast are kathoey performers. Many trans women in Thailand describe themselves simply as phuying, the Thai word for woman, and Wikipedia's article on kathoey records that they are more visible in Thai public life than trans people are in most countries, with popular models, singers and film stars among them. Discrimination still narrows the jobs open to many, and cabaret is one of the fields where many find work. Treat the evening as you would any theatre night: applaud the dancing, ask before taking a picture with anyone, and keep remarks you would not make to a ballet company to yourself.

How the hour runs

You arrive a little before your session and exchange the voucher on your phone for a ticket at the theatre, then find your seat. Once the house lights drop, the numbers follow one another for about an hour, each arriving with a change of costume and scenery. Phones and cameras stay out of sight for the whole show. When it ends, members of the cast are available for photos, and each picture with them carries a small fee. Start times differ from one session to the next; the booking calendar shows them, and so does your voucher once you have booked.

Buying at the door or booking ahead

The theatre sells tickets at its own desk as well, so you can get in without booking. A booking's real job is to lock in the session you want and spare you the queue to buy, which counts most on busy evenings around Christmas, when Phuket is at its fullest, or when you have just one free night. A booking can also be cancelled free until 24 hours ahead, and paying for it can wait until later. With open evenings and a hotel close by, walking up and buying in person is a reasonable way to do it.

Cameras, phones and the photo fee

Photography is strictly prohibited inside the theatre, and the rule covers phones as well as cameras. The upside is a room full of people watching rather than filming, which suits a show built on costume reveals. After the curtain you can have your picture taken with performers for a small fee for each photo. Keep a little Thai baht handy, ask before you step in beside anyone, and settle the fee before you walk away. The performers are working, and a quick thank-you goes a long way.

Who this isn't for

It isn't for anyone who wants live singing or a band, since every number is mimed to a recording. It isn't for people hoping to eat with the show, because the ticket covers admission and nothing else. Children are admitted and child rates exist, but an hour of loud music and strong light in a dark auditorium is not every small child's idea of a good time, so think about yours before you book. And if a cast of kathoey performers makes you uneasy, this is not your evening; the hour works best for people who arrive ready to cheer.

Fitting it into a Phuket evening

Because the show lasts about an hour and takes place in Patong, it slots in easily around dinner in town and a stroll on the sand. Patong is Phuket's main tourist resort and the heart of its night-time trade, so there is plenty going on before and after the curtain, and Bangla Road, the town's best-known nightlife street, is there if you want to carry on. If you are weighing the cabaret against a whole-evening outing such as a sunset dinner cruise, the comparison guide lays out how the two differ.

Read next: Cabaret or sunset dinner cruise?

Getting there

The theatre is in Patong, and the meeting point on your booking opens in Google Maps. From hotels along the Patong beach road you can walk or take a few minutes in a taxi; from Kata, Karon or further afield, a taxi or a car through the Grab app is the usual way, and Phuket's taxis generally work on fixed rates. Leave enough time to collect your ticket before the start, and allow for evening traffic. Nothing about transport is included, so plan the ride home as well.

Read next: Getting to the Patong cabaret